Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Some never outgrow it

Well, I've been slowly trying to re-connect with folks from South River with the idea that we might have a re-union in 3 years. It's hard to believe that 50 years will be coming up. One would think that by this time all the grudges, nastiness, backbiting, and other high school adolescent behavior would be a thing of the past. Being in psychiatry means that I subscribe to the idea that people develop, mature, and grow and that they are capable of change. Being a realist, I know that is not always the case.
I had an interesting experience with this social networking. Apparently someone from high school looked me up through the university, and sent me an email to my professional email address. I paste it here: "Hey aren't you the Wanda Troyanowski from SR with the crazy parents and big time problems? How's it hangin?" The email address gives no clue as to this cowardly person's identity and frankly I do not care who it is. Talk about someone with big time problems.
Yes, I am the Wanda nee Troyanowski from SR who had "crazy" parents. My mother was bipolar, my father drank and had a big time personality disorder and it was an abusive family. My brother was not the epitome of mental health and I had a pretty grim time of it. Friends were almost non existent because I didn't want to bring anyone home. Odds should have been that my life should have ended as bitterly as theirs -- or as obviously disturbed as my email friend "angelover" who sent me that snarky email.
But -- I got over it and got out of there and was successful beyond anyone's including my own expectations. Seems that some people simply don't have the capacity to turn it around. Angelover, you only wish that you were as blessed as I am. I hope you find some measure of peace with yourself.

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

December 2009
Another year has passed and it dawned on us that it has been nearly 15 years since we moved back to the east coast. Time really does fly when you’re having fun!
This year has been busier than ever. We managed 6 different countries this year: Austria, Czech Republic, Denmark, Sweden, Italy, and Switzerland. The Czech Republic and Sweden were our favorites. Beautiful, clean, and well governed countries, great food and affable people. We decided that had we not had grandbabies and children here, we’d move to Sweden in a heartbeat.
Wanda was on sabbatical during which we traveled, and she presented nationally and internationally. She is working on a new book with Dr. Allan Tasman geared to medical students and psychiatric trainees, and is on the 8th edition of her own text. The sabbatical will be over with the start of the spring semester, but she won’t be back teaching for much longer as she has decided to retire and become Professor Emeritus in Spring of 2011. Yay! No more faculty meetings. More time with grandbabies. Double Yay!
Brian is doing his investment advisement and is thankful that we have lost no large amounts of money during this terrible downturn. Ever the optimist, he took the recession as a time of opportunity and bought opportunities like crazy. He is enjoying life, enjoying his home, which is a never ending money pit, is fighting with the Canada geese and the deer that have a penchant to be horribly dirty and destructive. He is looking forward to his 50th high school reunion in 2 years and has connected with several friends who he had lost touch with. He is healthy except for the usual aches and pains that we all have at this age. Aging surely is not for the faint hearted.
We have always lived busy and full lives, reading much, museum trolling, traveling, and squeezing in hobbies as well as good works on behalf of others. But, there is nothing to compare with the advent of all these grandbabies to make life complete. They are such a joy. Every new development is a wonder. With three toddlers of the same age, it has become very interesting, but has underscored the limits of our physical endurance. Just when we thought that we were in great shape for our age, a few days with Sophie, Jacqueline, or Alina, is enough to bring us back to reality and realize why the natural order of things is to have young people bear the babies.
It would come as a surprise to no one that Shannon and Tara are both fabulous mothers and we just can’t say enough about Jon and Mike. They were born to be dads and the baby girls are wild for their fathers.
Despite the nuisance of the Philadelphia political situation, graft, corruption, and patronage that we try to ignore, we love living here. It has to be the perfect geographical spot for people who love music, shows, and museums and within driving distance to Washington DC and New York should we run out of activities here. The only downside is not having Shannon, Jon and the twins closer.
We hope this letter finds all of you fit and happy. Here’s looking forward to another wonderful year! And I have decided to post my blogs on facebook. Hoping to reconnect with folks who neither of us have seen for a while.
Wanda and Brian